Precious Memory

by Kay Heitsch

As I was about to go out the Memory Care Center door, Naomi, one of my favorite residents, asked if we could sing a song. Singing is something I did a lot while I worked at the Memory Care Center. I found that singing had a calming effect on the residents. Naomi suggested her usual song, "Amazing Grace." 

We were singing "Amazing Grace" as we walked into the family room, where about 9 or 10 residents were sitting.  Seeing the group in the family room, Naomi had an idea. "Why don't we get in a big circle and hold hands and sing." "Why not!" I chuckled. 

We were gathering the wheelchair people in the circle, and the rest who could stand took their hands. Since we had already finished singing "Amazing Grace," Naomi suggested we sing "Jesus Loves Me."   I thought I was going to cry as I saw the look of peace and joy on each resident's face as they sang, "Jesus Loves Me," swinging their arms to the tune.  

Most of these people had no short-term memory left, but they still had the precious memory that Jesus loved them.

"Flabby"

by Kay Heitsch

My husband Bill's Grandma Z was quite a character. Over the years, we grew very close, and I was actually with her when she died.

In Grandma Z's later years, she lived in a nursing home. Her eyesight was almost gone, and she spent most of her day in a wheelchair. For the most part, her mind was sharp until the end of her life at age 101.

We lived out of state for several years and didn't see her all that often. However, when we did, she always brought a smile to my face. Grandma had her way of saying things that would crack me up.

On one of our visits, she leaned forward in her chair and said, "Kay, let me feel your legs." Knowing Grandma, I shouldn't have been surprised, but I was. "Are you kidding? What for and why?" was all I could think to say.

Grandma didn't explain but insisted, so I let her feel my legs. After giving each leg a few squeezes, she sat back in her wheelchair. In a very matter-of-fact way, she announced, "Kay, you're getting flabby! You know, I don't tell everybody this." I didn't know quite what to think. Should I be happy she had selected, just me, to tell this to?

If that wasn't bad enough, Grandma went on. Now she wanted to know how much I weighed. I thought I'd just tease her, so I joked that I wasn't about to answer that question.

Grandma was quiet for a moment. Then trying to catch me off guard, she continued, "I weigh 111 right now. Where do you come in around that number?" I laughed and let her know I knew she was trying to trick me into telling her my weight, and it wasn't going to work! I weighed about 103 at the time. Indeed not a heavy duty!

Maybe I should have just ignored Grandma's "flabby" comment, but I didn't. I decided to join a fitness club after we returned home. I went faithfully and had a fun time exercising with the girls. Plus, I made some lifelong friends in the process.

The following summer, we were back at the nursing home visiting Grandma Z. After giving her a hug, I announced, "Hey Grandma, I joined a fitness club! Don't you want to feel my legs?" With a tone only Grandma would use, she gasped, "Heaven's no, why would I?" I laughed and continued, "Well, last time we were here, you wanted to feel my legs, and you actually said, "Kay, you're getting flabby!" after feeling them.

I'll never forget Grandma's response. In a tone of disbelief, she scoffed, "Flabby, flabby?? That word is not even in my vocabulary!"

Bury The Bird

by Kay Heitsch

Has God ever asked you to do something you thought was ridiculous?

Around six months after my son Todd's death, my younger son Brandon (then three) began stuttering. You see, Brandon and I went for a walk each night, and about this time, we saw a dead, decaying bird lying on the side of the road. Brandon referred to the bird as being "dead, just like Todd." He spoke of Todd often, and many people suggested that he needed professional help to deal with Todd's death. I took the problem right to the Lord.

As I prayed about Brandon's problem, it seemed that the Lord was telling me to bury the bird. But I argued against this. After all, I did not wish to have to bury every dead animal we might see; I did not even want to touch this one!

Finally, I gave in. We scooped up the bird in a bucket and brought it home. We dug a hole in the yard, and we talked. I told Brandon to shake the bird and call it; I did the same. I then said to him that only Jesus could wake the little bird. I quoted the Bible and told him that one day Jesus would come back and call with a loud voice, and all who loved Him would come alive again. I said we would see Todd the minute Jesus woke him.

The following day when Brandon woke up, he did not stutter, and he has not stuttered since that date--the six-month anniversary of Todd's death. A miracle? Yes, I believe it was, and even though the idea to bury the bird seemed ridiculous to me, it had been the answer to my prayers.

Lord, help us to do whatever you tell us to do even though it may sound ridiculous to us. Amen 

Miracles Do Happen

by Kay Heitsch

I'd like to share with you a very touching story of a couple I met at the Memory Care Center.

Henry was a one-of-a-kind type of guy. He came to the Memory Care Center 7 days a week from 3-7. Emma, his wife of over 50 years, was a resident there. Emma had suffered a brain aneurism that had left her totally helpless. Emma seldom spoke, and when she did, you really weren't sure what she was trying to say. I'm not even sure she knew Harry when he came to stay with her each day. One day Harry came up to me just beaming! With a big smile on his face, he said, "Emma said, 'Thank you when I put the pillow in her wheelchair. Miracles do happen!"

Yes, miracles do happen, and that day the simple words, "Thank you," were miracle words to Harry.

Thank You Father

by Kay Heitsch

As this is the month of Thanksgiving, I'd like to share a touching story that happened at the Memory Care Center.

Ken, one of our residents, came in with a feeding tube. After some time, the feeding tube was removed, and he was able to eat pureed food. The first day Ken was given his pureed food, Ken dug right in like there was no tomorrow. After he had eaten it all, he began to pray out loud. In a loud voice, Ken prayed, "Our Father who art in heaven, thank you for this delicious food I have just eaten." Ken went on and on praising God for this mashed-up food.

I was moved by Ken's prayer. I know I may have felt like complaining if I had to eat this food, but Ken was thankfully praising God. I realized then that I take so much for granted.

This Thanksgiving season, I pray that I will be thankful for the simple things in life and not take them for granted.

The Greatest Day Of My Life!

by Kay Heitsch

When I woke up, I didn't realize that this would be the greatest day of my life!

A few weeks had passed since Todd's death in the car accident. People had been very generous in bringing in food for our family. But the time came when I had to venture out to the grocery store.

My first experience of grocery shopping did not go well! I had Brandon, our two-year-old son, in the grocery cart. I'd gone down several aisles when I came to the cereal section. Without thinking, I reached up to grab Todd's favorite cereal. I broke out in a cold sweat, realizing I didn't need to buy this anymore. I jerked my hand back. I felt stunned for an instant. All of a sudden, I thought I was going to burst into tears. Since I didn't want anyone to see me crying, I grabbed Brandon and left the shopping cart right in the cereal aisle. With tears burning my eyes, I drove straight home.

The following week I was completely dressed and ready to go back to the grocery store when I felt panic grip me. I started to think, "What will my reaction be if I reached for one of Todd's favorites again?" I was feeling out of control.

Before Todd's death, life seemed pretty easy for me to control. But Todd's death had been very hard on me. Quite frankly, I really didn't want to go on living without him. Now the fear of being "out of control" made me feel paralyzed to even leave the house. Another thought came: "What are you going to do?" I knew I couldn't go on living with this paralyzing fear and grief. I knew drugs, alcohol, food, or anything else would not take this kind of pain and fear away.

My mind went back to the last few years. I'd been reading books about people who had to overcome lives. I needed that kind of life now—the kind of life where no matter what happened, I would be able to handle it. Of course, I wanted to live this life, on my own, without God's involvement. I'd been doing pretty well, staying positive until Todd's death. Now I was beginning to see that this wasn't possible anymore.

Deep down, I knew what these "overcoming" people had that I didn't. I recognized that they had a personal relationship with God through Jesus Christ. I wanted this overcoming life, too. I understood that I desperately needed it to go on for my family.

I had finally come to the end of myself. I couldn't muster up enough positive thinking on my own anymore. I could see that this kind of overcoming life wasn't possible without God's power. I fell to my knees right where I stood. I admitted to the Lord-- and to myself--that He was the power, and I needed it right then. Immediately, I felt this flood of peace and "liquid love" filling me. My panic and fear were gone.

When I woke up that morning, I didn't realize that this would be the greatest day of my life, but it sure was!

My Mother's Day Surprise

by Kay Heitsch

It was the day before Mother's Day. I was sitting in my usual spot, spending alone time with the Lord. I looked up and noticed the little Mother's Day statue Todd had given me many years before. I had it on a shelf, along with other memories of days gone by. It was hard to believe it had been 25 years ago that Todd had died in a car accident.

As I sat in my chair, lost in my memories, I thought, "It would sure be nice to receive something again from Todd on Mother's Day, Lord." I knew it was far-fetched to desire something like this, but I wasn't going to tell anyone, and I even thought, "This is between You and me, Lord."

I got up and went about my daily activities. I was out mowing when the thought came to me again. I smiled, wondering if I might be surprised.

Later that night, my husband, Bill, came in from being gone for a few days. He walked in with a rose. He handed it to me and said it was from Todd! I was overwhelmed! Never in the past 25 years had anyone given me anything and said it was from Todd. I knew the Lord had heard and answered the "desires and secret petitions of my heart."

Delight yourself also in the Lord, and He will give you the desires and secret petitions of your heart. Psalm 37:4