Fran's Silent Night

by Kay Heitsch

I will never hear "Silent Night" and not think of Fran*. No matter where Fran was, you could hear her humming the first two bars of "Silent Night." This constant humming of only the first two bars of this beautiful melody could be annoying. Knowing that Fran had Alzheimer's helped me forgive her repetitive humming.

I remember Fran when she first lived in the "Memory Care" unit. She was a tall, nice-looking woman. Like most residents, Fran often walked, humming "Silent Night." Fran had quite an eye for any man who came into the unit. I would always tease her and tell her to let me know if any "good-looking" guys came in.

Fran and I developed a special friendship. You never know how long the progression of this disease will take. For Fran, it seemed like she went downhill very quickly. It wasn't long before she stopped talking and only hummed the first two bars of "Silent Night."

It wasn't long before she was unable to walk. She went from a regular wheelchair to a wheelchair that would recline, as she was unable to sit up anymore. My heart would break to see her lounging in the chair, staring up at the ceiling but still humming the two bars of "Silent Night."

Whenever I walked by her, I would stop and give her a little kiss on her forehead. I would also give her hand a slight squeeze. There would never be any response.

About a week before Christmas, I walked over to Fran as she was reclining in the wheelchair. As usual, I kissed her on the forehead and took her hand. She turned her head, looked me in the eyes, and said, "I love you. And I like you too." I was stunned! Fran hadn't spoken in months. Tears filled my eyes as I told Fran I loved and liked her. The following day, Fran passed on.

I stopped by the funeral home for Fran's calling hours. Christmas was only a few days away. As I walked in, I noticed her family had a small Christmas tree sitting on a table. A note asked each person to decorate the tree with some tinsel they had in a box sitting on the table. The family said Christmas had been Fran's favorite holiday, and she always had a tree with tinsel on it.

I could not attend Fran's funeral, but her family shared with me that the carol "Silent Night" would be playing as people passed by her casket to pay their last respects. I know Fran would have been pleased, and I'm sure she was humming along in Heaven.

*Name has been changed.

Christmas Prayer

by Kay Heitsch

As we slowly drove down the street on that cold December evening, we spotted the porch light. "This must be the house." I told our "Positive Teens In Action" group.

We pulled up in front of an older home with the porch light glowing. We gathered up our songbooks, walked up the steps, and knocked on the door. We heard a faint voice from inside say, “Come on in. The door is open." We opened the door.

There, in a rocking chair, sat an elderly woman with a big smile on her face. "I've been expecting you," she said weakly. Ruth was one of our Meals On Wheels stops I had arranged, along with the usual church members who enjoyed carolers.

We handed Ruth the basket of goodies the teens had assembled earlier that evening. Then I asked Ruth what carols she would like to hear. Ruth's face was beaming as she joined in, singing each song.

As we hugged Ruth good-bye, she said to me with tears glistening in her eyes, “The day you called, I was still in bed. I had just finished praying. I asked God if it would be possible to have some Christmas Carolers come to my home and sing this year. Thank you for being the answer to my Christmas prayer."

Wow, what an incredible experience to have the opportunity to be the answer to someone's Christmas prayer.

Bible Text: When you pray, go to your room, close the door, and pray to your unseen Father. And your Father, who sees what you do in private, will reward you. Matthew 6:6

Make Good Memories

By Kay Heitsch

My husband, Bill's Grandma, Z., was in a nursing home when we moved back to Michigan. Grandma had been unable to walk for quite some time; now, her eyesight was almost gone.

Over the years, Grandma Z. and I exchanged many cards and letters. I knew how she enjoyed staying in touch with people.

Since I'd returned to Michigan, Grandma Z. thought I should be her "personal secretary." Trying to jog her memory, I said, "I guess you've forgotten how bad my handwriting is." Grandma Z. acted like she didn't hear me.

Grandma would have me write letters in the cards she would send. She would dictate; then, I would do my best to write down what she said. Grandma would always have me read what I had written back to her. Grandma had no problem hearing them because she always told me, "That is not exactly how I said that!" I would then rewrite whatever I wrote in her exact words.

Since I had some extra time before Christmas, I asked Grandma if she would like to send Christmas cards. Grandma readily agreed. I rounded up several different kinds of cards. I knew she had friends and family who all had other interests. I would take each card and describe the front of the card in detail, and then I would read the verse inside. After thinking it over, Grandma would tell me who she thought would like each card.

After a while, I looked up, and I noticed that we had several nursing home residents standing in the doorway. As I read each card, I started to see the look on their faces and Grandma Z's face, too. Each one had a faint smile and a faraway look as they saw the scenes in their mind's eyes.

When I went over to do the Christmas cards, I thought I would be doing Grandma Z. a favor, but it turned out that she did me a big favor. I'll always cherish this precious memory of bringing Christmas joy and pleasant memories to Grandma and her fellow residents.

Thanks to Grandma Z., I made a "good memory" to pass on to you.

Be Thankful And Say So

by Kay Heitsch

This week of Thanksgiving, I'd like to share two stories.

How thankful are you for the ability to talk and to eat? I never thought about this until my Aunt Ruth had a stroke and could not speak or eat. Before her stroke, she would call me, or I'd call her, and she would always ask me what I was planning to make for dinner that night. I could see how important our daily talks and eating were to her. When Aunt Ruth had her stroke, she could not talk or eat; she was given a feeding tube to keep her alive.

For many years I worked in a memory care center. Ken was a resident at the memory care center. When he first arrived, Ken also had a feeding tube like Aunt Ruth. Ken was able to have his feeding tube removed and was able to start eating pureed food.

The first day when the pureed food was put in front of Ken, he immediately began to eat nonstop. After he was finished eating, I noticed tears in his eyes. Ken then bowed his head and started to pray out loud. I'll never forget Ken's prayer. "Our Father who art in heaven, thank you for this delicious food I have already eaten."

I was moved by Ken's devotion, knowing that I would no doubt complain if I had to eat this pureed food, but Ken was thankfully praising God.

This Thanksgiving, I remember Aunt Ruth and Ken. I pray I'll never take for granted the many blessings I have, especially the ability to talk and enjoy a delicious meal. HAPPY THANKSGIVING TO EACH OF YOU!

"I will proclaim with the voice of thanksgiving. And tell of all Your wondrous works. Psalm 26:7

"Happy Birthday, From Todd"

by Kay Heitsch

It was November 17th, Todd's birthday. It didn't matter how many years had gone by since Todd's death; his birthday was still a memorable but sad day for me.

I slowly walked down to the mailbox at the end of the driveway. I was feeling pretty low even though I was trying to keep a positive outlook. I took out the mail from the box and walked up the hill towards the house.

As I sorted through the mail, I saw a letter from The Peale Center. "What on earth could this be?" I wondered. I opened the letter and read, "Dr. Peale would like permission to print your letter "In Loving Memory of Todd" as the Introduction in a hardback edition of "Have A Great Day-Every Day!"

I could hardly believe it! I'd given the paperback book "Have A Great Day!" to Todd's friends and family in memory of him after his death. This book was very special to Todd and to me. After Todd's death, I'd found several of the daily readings from this book in a journal he'd kept for a class project.

The timing of this letter was perfect! Here it had arrived right on Todd's birthday. What better gift could I ever give Todd than to continue to allow the Lord to bring something positive out of his death?

Thank you, Lord, for yet another opportunity. * "Have a Great Day-Everyday!" was the Loyalty Month book in 1991. This hardback, positive thought for the daybook can be ordered from: The Peale Center 66 East Main Street Pauling, NY 12564 (1.866.713.7278) The letter that I wrote about my son, Todd, is registered as the Introduction in this book on Page 8.

The Mistake

by Kay Heitsch

"The way we choose to respond when others make mistakes can cause them to feel ashamed or can allow them to remember our kindness and share our stories with future generations." -- Michelle Sedas

When I read the above quote, I couldn't help but think of Doris.* Doris was a little lady who lived in the memory care unit. She had been a science teacher by profession, but she also was a very creative person. All around her room were dolls that she had made. They were the most unique dolls I'd ever seen; each was very different from the other.

From what I gathered from talking to Doris, she'd taken a class in doll making. While I was in her room, she took one of the dolls out of the case to show me. She said that this was the first doll she had ever made. This doll was very unusual with fine artwork. The ceramic skirt was made of delicate ruffles. I was amazed that anyone could do such unique work.

As Doris was holding the doll very carefully, she turned the doll so that I could see a slight break in one of the ruffles on the skirt. Then she said, "Would you like me to tell you about this?" Of course, I was curious to know what happened. Doris noted that on the way to class, she bumped the side of the skirt. She said she was devastated and almost didn't go to art class at all.

When it came to her turn to show the doll to the teacher, she had to point out the skirt's break. Doris felt for sure that the doll would be rejected because of it. Much to her surprise, the teacher told her she was just going to ignore this break and grade the doll on the other good qualities it had. Doris said this remark and attitude from the teacher changed her life. Doris said she knew if that teacher hadn't forgiven that tiny mistake, she would never have made the rest of the dolls.

The quote at the beginning expresses what happened to Doris. This teacher could have made Doris feel ashamed by her mistake. But because of her willingness to ignore the error, Doris was sharing her kindness to the next generation.

*Name has been changed.

A Better Plan

by Kay Heitsch

"Hello, is this Kay Heitsch?" 

I started to get used to hearing these words when I answered the phone after "In Loving Memory of Todd" went into print. I was thrilled to hear from people from all over the United States who had read the Plus Magazine letter. 

Dr. Peale's staff continued to stay in touch with me too. I enjoyed hearing from Ann, Dr. Peale's secretary, and Ric, the Plus Magazine editor. We had developed quite a friendship. I still remembered the prayer I'd prayed asking the Lord to meet Dr. Peale or his staff. I felt the prayer had been answered. 

However, the Lord had something else in mind, too. One day I received a brochure in the mail from the Peale Center. It was announcing Positive Thinking Seminars. I saw that one was being held in Cincinnati, Ohio. I lived in Dover, Ohio, at the time, so I felt this would be my perfect opportunity to meet Dr. Peale and his staff in person. I laid the brochure on the counter in the kitchen and prayed over it many times. The Positive Thinking Seminar in Cincinnati came and went, but I was unable to attend. I was very disappointed. 

One day I went out to the mailbox, not expecting anything special when I saw a letter from the Peale Center. I could see this letter had a regular stamp, so I knew it wasn't bulk mail. I ran inside and opened it. I couldn't believe my eyes when I read the letter. The words, "Kay, you have been chosen by Dr. Peale to receive his Norman Vincent Peale Award for Positive Thinking. Dr. Peale will be presenting you with this award in person. You will be receiving the award at the Positive Thinking Seminar in Atlanta, Georgia." What? I ran and grabbed the old brochure, and sure enough, right under the Positive Thinking Seminar in Cincinnati, Ohio, was Atlanta, Georgia. I hadn't even seen Atlanta, Georgia; I was too focused on Cincinnati, Ohio. 

This taught me a valuable lesson. Sometimes we get our hearts set on something we think we want (Cincinnati, Ohio) when the Lord has a much better plan (Atlanta, Georgia).

"Lord, You Know I Can't"

by Kay Heitsch 

"Hi Kay, this is Dee. You know why I'm calling and what I'm going to ask you again." I sighed. "Dee, you understand very well I can't come over and talk at your church." I did write the letter, "In Loving Memory of Todd," but quite frankly, the Lord helped me write it. I can't come out and talk about Todd's death in public." There was a short pause. "Kay, our minister, and several people have read the story, and we believe the Lord wants you to share your testimony. I'm going to keep calling until you agree to come. I'll talk to you soon. Goodbye." I hung up the phone. 

"You must be kidding; I can't believe Dee will not accept "No" for an answer," I mumbled to myself. I'd known Dee for years. In fact, Dee had given me the baby shower for Todd. Back in those days, neither Dee nor I were Christians. In fact, we'd spent a few nights in bars together. We hadn't seen each other in years, though. Bill had been her boss when we lived in Norton, Ohio. We had moved several times, even out of the state, and now here we were back in Ohio. Dee was working for Bill again, sixteen years later. 

I hadn't been a Christian very long. In fact, I wasn't a member of any church when Dee kept calling. I'd heard about her church from other people, though. They were this "Spirit-filled" bunch. I wasn't sure what that all meant, so I didn't even know what to expect if I ever did go. 

I started to talk to the Lord about Dee's constant calling and insistence on me coming to share my testimony. "Now listen, Lord, You know very well I can't go over to Dee's church and talk. I don't want to cry in public, for one thing. I don't even know what I would say. You know better than anyone; I haven't even been going to church. I can't do this, and You know it." From deep within me, I heard a still small voice, "I know you can't, Kay. You couldn't write either, remember? If I helped you write, I'd help you talk."

 I have no idea where they came from or who sent them, but I began receiving Christian magazines in the mail. One magazine arrived shortly after my last conversation with Dee and the Lord. On the front cover was a cartoon of Moses. Inside of the magazine was an article about the different excuses Moses gave the Lord for why he could not do what the Lord wanted him to do. I started to see that I was doing the same thing Moses did. I was even coming up with some of the same excuses. 

The phone rang again. "Hi Kay, this is Dee. I'm not calling to ask you if you'll come and talk this time." Oh good, I'm off the hook!" I felt relieved. "No, I'm calling giving you a date and time when we will be expecting you to come over to our church and share your testimony. We'll be seeing you on Super Bowl Sunday night." 

Well, after the magazine article I'd read and the Lord's message to me, I thought I'd better go. After all, I figured no one would be there anyway because it was on Super Bowl Sunday night. Boy, was I wrong? There were lots of cars in the parking lot when I arrived. To be honest, I really don't know what I said that night. All I remember is that after I talked, people came forward giving me lots of hugs, which I needed. This "Spirit-filled" group was exactly the group I needed to begin sharing my testimony with. They were loving and kind and not afraid to show their feelings; I felt blessed by the experience. 

"Hi Dee, this is Kay. Thank you for allowing me to come and share my testimony." There was a pause. "Kay, the Lord and I both knew that He would give you the strength you needed to do it."

Ask And You Shall Receive

by Kay Heitsch,

I was standing in the bathroom putting on my make-up when the phone rang. I answered it. "Hello. Is this Kay Heitsch?" "Yes," I replied. "Hi Kay, my name is Ric Cox. I'm the Executive Editor at the Peale Center for Plus Magazine. Dr. Peale received the letter you recently sent him and asked me to call.

First, I need to ask, are you a professional writer?" "No," I replied. "Well, we were wondering because of the way the letter was written." "I didn't write that letter," I blurted out. "What?" was Ric's response. "Well, I did write it, but I wrote it so fast I truly believe the Lord wrote it through me." "Oh, I understand what you're saying now." Ric went on,

"Kay, Dr. Peale was wondering if you would give him permission to print your letter in Plus Magazine." I was shocked. "Certainly, I will give my permission to print this letter. I would be honored to have my letter printed in his magazine," I said. "We'll be sending you a printout of how your letter will appear in the magazine and some other papers in a few weeks," Ric explained before he said goodbye.

Just that morning, during my Bible study and prayer time, I'd made a request to the Lord. I'd asked if it is His will that I might meet Dr. Peale or one of his staff. I felt meeting Dr. Peale would be an excellent motivator for me to stay on track. However, I told the Lord to forget the idea if I was going to be disappointed. I've found that I don't always know what's good for me. After hanging the phone up, I remembered my prayer. Wow! "Ask, and you shall receive," came to my mind.

A few weeks later, I received an envelope in the mail from the Peale Center. I took the envelope to the house, put it on the counter in the kitchen and opened it. As I pulled the papers out, I was stunned to see that the Peale Center had given my letter to Dr. Peale a title: "In Loving Memory of Todd."

I felt overwhelmed at the sight of those words. I could see the Lord had also answered another prayer. A few months earlier, when I gave my life to the Lord, I'd asked the Lord to bring something positive out of Todd's death. Now I could clearly see He was doing just that.